An Out of This World Birthday

Z is now four....hard to believe!  This past weekend he had 2 of his 3 birthday parties (yes I know, I know).  His first birthday was a friend party at a local bounce house.  There were four inflatable bounce houses (including a giant one with a slide), 18 children over age one, 7 babies, a bunch of parents, my babysitter and my dad :)  It was pure chaos and Z loved every minute of it. 

We had a space theme (Planet Heroes to be specific) and made all of the decorations by hand.  Z helped with every aspect of his party.  He helped plan it, desgin the decorations, make and fill the goody bags, bake the cookies (he hates cake) and deocorate the cupcakes.  It was a bit frustrating at times having to move so slowly with my junior party planner but in the end I would not have wanted it any other way.  Because he was so involved in the planning and creating of the party, he began to realize how much work it all was.  At one point he looked at me while we were printing off some decorations and he said, "Thank you Mommy".  That alone made everything I was doing worth it!

Z's second party was with S's family.  This party was a breakfast space party (his favorite meal) and came complete with a donut cake!!!!  It was lot's of fun and he was given his bike at this party (although the planet hero he received from his grandparents trumped the bike....oh well).  It was a wonderful weekend and very soon he will have his third celebration with my family and all of his lake friends.  We can't wait.

Growing Up

Lil' C is in the beginning stages of walking and so I have been desperately trying to capture it on film.  I have wonderful footage of Z taking his first steps and every time I go to film Lil' C she either falls and starts crawling or Z gets in front of the camera and tries to steal the show :)  Last night I decided to show Z his movie in hopes that he would be more understanding when it comes to filming Lil' C during this major milestone. 

While we watched the video, I began to tear up.  Z asked what was wrong and I tried to explain to him that I was a little sad because my babies were growing up.  Z will be four at the end of this month and C is one month away from turning one!!!  This fact has had me emotional for a few weeks now but seeing the video of Z as a baby.....it was just too much for me. 

Z came and patted my back and said,

"It's okay Mommy but you can't change us back.  We are suppose to grow up." 

Hearing these wise words come out of my almost four year old made me cry even harder.  It is true, they are suppose to grow up and I can't make them babies again....I just wish that we could press the pause button for awhile and truly enjoy the present.

Change

 

It has been over 2 months since I have visited this blog or anyone's blog.  As a matter of fact, I had no intentions of visiting it tonight but one wrong click and my blog appeared and it was as if an old friend (or friends) were begging me to stay for just a little while.  So here I am....for now.

This summer has been all about change for us.  The biggest change was the absence of Scott's sister.  How do we fill the empty hole at the dinner table or the bigger hole in our hearts?  They say that time heals all wounds but for those of us who are late to the grieving table, it only seems to be getting worse.  We know that grieving is a process and that this first year of "firsts" will be difficult.  S's parents desperately want to find away to help Kiki's memory live on.  We have brainstormed hundreds of different options but we truly struggle to find the best way to honor her life and the amazing person that she was. 

Another huge change for us was S's job.  S's company was sold and he was offered a very good job with the new company down south in GA.  We spent many hours discussing the pros and cons of the move.  We love New England and most of our family and friends are within 2 hours of us.  It was hard to imagine living so far away (even if it was in a gigantic, beautiful house) and feeling so alone.  Some thought we were crazy to turn down such a job but S is very excited to be starting his own company (I know, crazy times to be starting business) and so that is what we are doing.  We decided we would rather live in a cardboard box and be surrounded by family than live in a 5,000 square foot home with a nanny and a butler (okay I am exaggerating just a bit) all alone. 

Another change (a good change) was that I finally figured out why I was feeling so sick all spring/summer.  It turns out that the thyroid is a pretty remarkable little gland for being so small and when it is under attack it doesn't function the way it should.  Many of the symptoms are similar to postpartum symptoms (infact my issues started off as postpartum hypothyroidism) and that is why it was difficult to pinpoint.  I am now on medication (for life) and my energy is slowly returning :)


I guess that is enough for now.  I do miss my blog friends and hope that when things get back into a routine around here that I will be able to stop by and visit.  I have decided that facebook and blogging had been taking up too much of my family time and so I have deleted my facebook page (not that it is ever really gone) and will not be blogging as frequently as I use to.  I do want to keep this outlet for myself though and love to have it as a sort of journal for my children.  I also know that my mom, mother in-law, a few friends and some aunts love to read it too so I plan to keep it going for them as well :)

 

Lil' C is almost 11 months!!!      Here she is crawling up to her new cousin J